Shins

Fucking hard on the legs today.  I ran further today, and straight from work, as is the plan.  I was feeling pretty good after work and had a coffee and headed out. 

I felt quite good, and really made an effort to run further again and to try to feel as though I was running with rhythm. 

Ran further and longer today and was happy with the run; although the stretch up Howe was definitely the hardest and needed a couple of breaks in there at times.

Although I really don’t feel as though the rhythm was completely there I did feel better about my ability to push and to run further in one stretch than I have been.  I pushed the first leg today and tried not to stop at lights if possible.  I figure I ran nearly two k with out stopping, although about 800m of this was down hill and there were a couple of small breaks in it; the total time coming up to about 11mins 30 secs or something.

 

 

 

 

 

 

4.1k

Really felt better about running today, and yesterday morning I wondered if it was ‘running day’ and was mildly disappointed when I realised that it wasn’t.

The only dampner is that my shins are starting to hurt.  Going to focus on preventative measures, ice & stretching and probably do a little taping job on my orthotics, as well as backing off the running when I get into the gym.  Will have to replace it with some cycling sessions at the smacky gym.  And going to try doing some running on the beach or something, the only pain in the arse about that is that I have to run down there, and back.

Quitting

Although the time this morning was not all that much slower than the other day, the run hurt more. Not surprising after how I felt last night, even up until this morning. I honestly was surprised at the time I ran this morning. I tried to run further between breaks today; and I was somewhat surprised at the first length that I ran. I was pleased at how I pushed myself, although the second half of the run was much harder than the first.

 

I felt pretty good up until Beach, but even the short stretch up beach wasn’t as hard as I expected. It was a pretty tough run, but I feel better for going, and I feel so much better about things for actually getting off my arse and going something.

 

Sticking to the promise that I made to myself – now it’s about the food.

 

3.34k

22:07

319 cal (11%)

AHR: 181

MHR: 195

 

Probably ran more consistently given that my MHR wasn’t as high as the other day; but at the same time I felt that I was running faster. Perhaps. It’s time to quit.

Ignorance is not bliss

So we’ve had a row.  Quite a big one for our standards.  My phone bill is significantly down but my feelings are completely up the left.  It all started about us going to Dublin for the weekend to meet Ms K.  It started when she lied to me about the reason she didn’t want to come, and said that it was my fault.  If only she had of been honest there wouln’t have been nearly the drama that there now is.  Safe to say that I’m feeling really shit about things at the moment.  We’ve agreed that we need to talk, but I’m just not sure where to start.  Perhaps some more ‘I’m angry at you cause I don’t want to be hurt by you’ time is needed.  I just don’t know.  Friday night stuff happened.  Sunday night stuff happened again.  Monday night we both ignore everything that probably needed to be said; Monday night I confront the issue (probably not in the most delicate way).  Tuesday I only text to find out the necessary questions – do you still want to come to the coast or is that too cookie jar?  Yesterday – communication embargo and ignoring each other when we’re in the gym.  Hmmm…what a way to go about repairing a friendship.

Just wasn’t into training today.  Did make the effort to go in and do something though, so I’m pleased about that.  I’m bitterly disappointed at the state of myself after a weekend bender.  It was so big that on Monday morning I actually phoned Mrs U to ask if we’d been drunk all weekend.  We both whole heartedly agreed that there was at least 12 hours when we didn’t either have a drink in our hand or be lost in a hazy morning after.  We don’t seem to get hangovers anymore.  A product of much alcoholism training we believe.  But it’s getting well expensive.  Mr U commented that the utility room looked rather like a bottling plant and that just cause you’re on pints doesn’t mean that you have to neck them.  Yet strangely enough neither of us really felt that blotted.  Hmmm.

Right, so training…

30 mins cardio

10 mins run intervals 60:30 at 11.5 & 5 mins walk at 5.8

Bike – 15 mins level 3 – 4.

391 cal, 18% Fat

MHR: 97:

AHR: 82%

Zones: H; 19:09; M: 11:39; L: 01:12

 

The other day when I ran I felt great.  No bother at all knocking out 2 minutes at 12 – today was a completely different story.  All shite and well up the left.  I don’t know whether it was something to do with my earphones breaking again.  I always, always train better with the ipod in.  Maybe cause it blocks everything else and all I’ve to focus on is the workout.  Maybe it’s cause I can just ignore everything and everyone.  Maybe it’s that it’s the music I want to hear, and I can have it LOUD!  I don’t know, but training isn’t the same without it.  I was fucking angry.  I had to get off the treadmill before the urge to hurl the ipod at the nearest wall overtook me…  I walked away, fuming.  I can’t live without my ipod.

 

We talked briefly in the gym this afternoon.  It was all uncomfortable.  I offered a spot for her last set of DB Bench, but she said she didn’t want one, she didn’t want me to drop the dumbbells on her head.  She said she thought I looked as though I wanted to kill her.  I wasn’t thinking that at all, I was thinking that it was uncomfortable; but I made an effort to go in and speak to her.  We talked as she left, but it was uncomfortable as hell and people kept coming along so it wasn’t productive at all.  I wouldn’t want to talk about that stuff in work anyway.  I don’t do head stuff at work.  I couldn’t even look at her, but when I did make eye contact I liked her just as much as ever.  It’s so confusing.  My head’s so messed up… 

Driving by the book

Training
Bike. 25 mins.  1 song at 3, 4, 5, 7, 8, + 2 mins @ 9. 2 mins @ 6 to 25 mins.
Run 1km at 10.5, 1.5% – 100m @ 11 & 120m @ 12 to end.  Under 6 mins.

 

Right shin is sore as fuck.  Icing  it now.  Cooling down the insides with an ice cold Miller.  Ice feels so good.  So so good.  I’ve drunk so much alcohol this week.  3 Millers left in the house – then it’s gone.  Till Pretty Marys Friday.

 

Pushed hard on the bike, although I feel fitter, so the easier level songs felt easier.  Very pleased that I pushed to 2 minutes at  9 when I was only going to go at 1 min.  Felt strong through the run, breating was in rhythm and my legs felt strong, even after the bike which was good.  Shins weren’t sore at all during the un, but sure are killing me now.

 

Was quite motivated through training.  Work was a completely different story though.  Did SFA and didn’t care at all.  Not the best employee at the moment.

Top Gear

Sad. Depressed. All alone. That’s me. Still hurt by the ex lying to me – took it out on the treadmill and felt great after a banging workout.

0945 – Thermobol, Detox
1000 – Training – 15 x 35:25 Run intervals – 12.0kph, 2% (6), 3% (9). 3 x 10 DB Bench (16s), VT (37.5) DB Lat Raise (5s), Cable Straight arm pulldown (12.5), Leg Press (70, 80, 70). 15 mins bike. Stretch – Hip flexors, glutes, hamstrings, calves, quads (by GI Joe). 1 lit water
11:30 – Thermobol, Promax Diet shake on 250ml Water
12:00 – Hot tub – stretch whole body + some hot/cold shower stuff. 1 lit water
12:40 – I’m knackered!
1530 – Oats, 2 scoops natural yoghurt, 1 plum, 1/2 nectarine. Coffee.
1600 – Coffee. 4 x 2 finger kit kat
1730 – 2 small packets of crisps
1830 – Golf – walked 11 holes – 2 hours. Approx 800cal.
2130 – Small packet of crisps, 150ml skim milk.
2200 – Grilled chicken & green veg, 1/8 avocado, 3 tsp balsamic dressing.

Cracking workout. Really pleased with my run intervals. Feel a lot stronger now running at 12. I think I will max out the speed there for a bit, work on volume – longer intervals and more of them. Sweat was pouring out of me today. After my run I was sitting on the end of a bench, composing myself (“come on, you’ve got to lift this weight”) & a puddle accumulated under where I was hanging my head. Was fair roasting in the gym this morning though. Worked hard, pushed through. Can definitely do more weight on a lot of the exercises I feel. Grip strength is the main issue with VT I think; but my shoulder is giving a little curry at the moment. Feels uncomfortable when I’m at full abduction, elbow just about above my head. Leg press I felt my lower back form giving a little at 80, which is why I dropped the weight for the last set – form over load.

Went out for a bit more of FLOG. I went round the back 9 in 41 shots, which got me 25 points. Absolutely astounding considering the crap I’ve been producing on the last couple of occasions. I did really well…focused on shots, concentrated. Putting was much better. I’ve no idea what the fuck is going on. It pisses me off that I can’t be as good as I want to be. Fucking shit! Why am I swearing so much?

Bit of a headache. Should probably come up with some meat & veg for dinner. I’ve some chicken thawed – just about getting the motivation up to cook it. After Top Gear. Right after Top Gear.

Things that have made me laugh this week:
1. Fies (feesh). Irish dancing competition. Hmmm.
2. NU’s Ireland jumper. Worn to Carnalea. I’d forgotten if I’d given it back to Mrs U. This was mentioned in the gym; to which she replied “We have it at home. I’ve washed it and all”. For a couple of moments there was sheer terror – I didn’t undress in the carpark did I? Finally remembered I wore my pink shirt home – phew. Terror over.
3. Radio Quiz. Q. “What’s the capital of Hungary?”. A. “Germany”. Enough said.
4. African children. HF kindly offered that I should give my curry stained clothes to SW to have washed. “She’s washing everyone’s clothes”. “Why”. “She’s African children”. “What; to wash her clothes?”.

Train relentlessly – never quit, never cheat and never give up.

Wrecked

God, bloody work again. Shit. Slept alright last night. Woke at 7ish when the alarm went off, but was good enough.

0800 – Thermobol

0840 – Oats, 2 spoons greek yoghurt & 2 nectarines. Green Tea.

1030 – Coffee, small apple

1300 – Medium bowl cream of tomato soup, 2 small white rolls, 2 tsp butter

1400 – Coffee

1630 – Thermobol

1730 – Training. Run intervals – 29mins. 30:30 ratio, 5% at 10, 10.5, 11, 11.2, 11.4, 11.6, 11.8, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12 (40:20), 12 (45:15), 11.8, 11.6, 11.4 (1 min break), 11.1, 11.1, 11.1, 11.1, 11.1 (60sec). HRM – 36min, 458cal (25% fat), MHR: 204% (203bpm). AHR: 88% (173bpm).

2000 – 1 kiwi fruit, green tea

2040 – Steak Sandwich (2 slices brown multigrain, piece of lean steak, 1 egg, 50g cheese, lettuce, 1/3 avocado, >1 tsp mayo, 1 tsp tomato sauce). 200g green veg – broccoli & green beans. 750ml water with drop of juice.

Absolutely busted. My head is sore. My legs are fatigued. I know when I’ve worked hard. I get ‘itchy’ across my forehead & around my eyes – feels like it’s burning up. Today it’s on fire. Shit! I worked so hard during the run today; but felt really strong. Didn’t feel like spewing at all, but was pretty maxed out. Very pleased with the workout today. I caught myself thinking of excuses not to train – mostly that Mr Big was still in the building and I thought he’d shout. HEL was right though…he didn’t. Merely asked if a big crowd could come and watch. No worries I said & off I went. I initially thought that I wouldn’t do as much as I did – particularly the 11 reps at 12kph. Busted, but very impressed with myself; the work that I put in. CLASS!

I maybe didn’t really eat enough today; although I did have something else. I just can’t remember. I can barely remember my name at the moment. I just want to lie down and sleep. But no. Wait a few hours – then sleep through the night. Fuck. I’m fucked. Although I felt tired this morning it wasn’t really fatigue; probably cause I had a feed of carbs last night. Was so good too, but at the moment I can’t stand the thought of having curry. Fish and veg for dinner tonight I feel.

Poets Day.

Was up at half 5 this morning, on 5 & 1/2 hours sleep. Felt well tired initially, but survived. Preparation, preparation, preparation – I made my salad for lunch, and by the time it came to eat it I was well looking forward to it. Loved the raw sweet corn mixed with tuna that was left towards the bottom. Will have to think of a way of combining the two, in manner of mayo; but without the mayo, so as to have a tuna & sweet corn sanga.

0600 – Detox & Thermobol
0635 – Oats, mango & greek yoghurt. Green Tea
0930 – 150g Carrot sticks, 100g Cottage Cheese
1330 – Salad with tuna
1500 – Coffee
1540 – Small apple
1550 – Training. 10 mins bike (warm up), DB Bench – 10 @ 10, 5 @ 30, 9 @ 25, 6 @ 18. 30 sec row. DBSP 3 x 10 @ 5, 6, 6. 30 sec row. Cable Pulldown 3 x 10 @ 22.5. Cable straight arm pulldown 3 x 10 – 10, 12.5, 12.5. Core work – FB Balance + sitting oblique MB throws + kneeling MB chest pass. Run intervals – 30:30 @ 5%, 10, 10.5, 11, 11.2, 11.4, 11.6, 11.8, 12, 12.2, 12.4 (45sec).
1710 – Promax Diet shake with 250ml skim milk & Thermobol
1730 – 1800 – 700ml water
1900 – small apple
1930 – 2130 – 1 Vodka, lime & soda. 1 small glass diet coke.
2215 – 1/2 sirloin steak with broccoli, beans, carrot & 1/2 cob sweetcorn.
2340 – Thermobol & Green tea

Fucking busted. Legs felt so fatigued while I was warming up…was struggling to push the fecking pedal at even level 4. Oh my god – what am I doing to myself. My forearms are dying…so tight it hurts to type. The run absolutely busted me. Was powering on through – the last 3 were devilishly hard; but I still pushed to do a 45sec run the last time through. Not sure I could have done much more than that. I don’t even know what I want to type, let alone get my fingers to type it. How the hell am I going to hold a club tomorrow?! Through the run it was my legs that gave out first – particularly when I got to the higher speeds. 30 sec seems to be my point, I was hitting it today. Glad to see **:40 pop up on the time screen, yet struggling to see how I was going to make it through the last 5 seconds. It was such a push to do the last one – but I did. Fucking awesome!!

Was so good at the pub tonight. I drove to the pub and kept to my plan of having one drink, then I had a skinny coke to stop from having another one. Stopped for broccoli on the way home as I was out and had planned to have steak & veg for dinner – skip the chinese. Thought, very briefly about buying a coke on the way home so I could have a rum & coke when I got back – glad I didn’t. Elated that I stuck to the plan, and that even though I went to the pub it was still a good day, diet wise. Was a great workout day too. Very stoked about the workout – really worked hard, and at the end of a week when I was tired & my legs were fatigued.

No amount of fancy gimmicks or equipment or adoption of alleged time-saving ‘fads’ will substitute for a long term program of hard work.

Deluge

Once again, I’m flooded in. The course is closed, the rain is coming, the wind is blowing up a storm and it’s absolutely pouring out. It’s so so cosy in. So cosy infact, that my bed seemed absolutely unleavable this morning. But no, training calls. Training seems to be the last thing on my mind, even though it is absolutely the first.

The rain is unbelievable. I can not believe the course is closed for the second Saturday running. So no golf. I was sort of needing that 4 hour walk today too. It’s an easy way to fit the exercise in without actually thinking about it. Even at a conservative estimate (considering I carry clubs and all) I would probably burn about 350 cal per hour. Maybe. Yes, there would be relatively little aerobic benefit, but walking 7 – 8k with an extra 15 – 20kg certainly would be doing something for the body. It’s still over 1400cal for a typical round, I think if it’s over 4 hours the extra calories generally wouldn’t count – standing around waiting and all.

Found this class website -> http://jumk.de/bmi/calorie-consumption.php that helps you calculate absolutely everything. It actually is very informative, and has some great calculators that would make doing the right thing so much easier. The nutritional list isn’t so comprehensive, and the ranges & explanations provided are a little weird, but it’s dutch – what does one expect?! Another handy website for calorie expenditure during exercise -> http://www.nutristrategy.com/activitylist3.htm there is a greater range of exercises, and although everything’s in pounds and miles, once you’ve that sorted, you’re set. Clearly American, and I don’t like American-ness. This -> http://www.gmap-pedometer.com/ is class. I actually think I need to tell people about this website! I calculate the mothership’s route – very impressive, 3.75k with hills. Ken HS route round H Park – 6.7k. This shite IS Bananas!

I’m so ashamed of my eating yesterday. Detox first thing this morning, and Thermobol. I got up and put on my ski jacket – definately looser than when I brought it, even than when the KW & I went to Iceland. Making me see that there is progress – that the mirror does infact, lie through all it’s shiney-ness. Right, off to train.

Today 75kg
0900 – Detox & Thermobol
1000 – Training. 25 mins bike (hills, first 5 peaked at 9, 400m recovery, then 5 on-off peaking at 8 & 9, 500m recovery). DB Bench Press 12, 12, 10 (16s), Cable High Row (triangle, standing) 3 x 12 (22.5, 25, 25), DB SP 12, 12, 10 (5, 6, 6); 15, 12 FB Crunches, FB Frog Kicks. 15 mins run – intervals 1:00 : 0:30 9kph 5%, walk rest 5% to cool down
1350 – 2 poached eggs on 1 slice granary bread with 2 tsp tomato sauce. Green tea
1700 – Medium Banana, 1/2 mango & 2 spoons greek yoghurt
1840 – 1/2 cob corn (raw), 3 roasted streaky pork strips, big portion green vege, come carrot, 1/2 cob corn.
1935 - Thermobol + 1/2 cherry ripe (125 cal)
2030 – 1 cherry ripe (250cal)
2200 – Thermobol, 1.5 L water

Training done – and I’m absolutely pumped. Feel extremely motivated for a wet Saturday. Pushed so hard through the bike – was absolutely roasting for the first 5 reps as no AC. Proper looked after with this AC’d gym thing – felt a lot easier when there was the odd spurt of cool air on me, but was also working at a lower intensity with 100m more recovery. Soft perhaps. Not a soft workout by any standard. Pushed so hard to complete 5 reps peaking at 9. The run was easier than I’d predicted…definately a good leg workout today with the combination of the cardio etc. Somehow, from somewhere I’ve gone down today, as opposed to the expected blow up from my pigging out last night. Maybe not having green tea before training though – not 100%. Without shoes it would have been 74.4 so I’m happy about that. Now I’m dying for poached eggs on toast, but may have to do some scavenging for some edible bread around the fungus crusted loaf that’s sitting on my bench…oh why do I do that to myself?!

Need to brave the deluge and head out for some groceries before I do end up flooded in…researching, reading & writing useful articles & information seems so much more attractive!

Apparently I can’t have cherry ripes in the house without devouring them. Only for tonight. Only this one.

I’ve just got word for my lovely laptop. I feel whole again!

8 Hours to dawn

Got a whole 8 hours last night, and I definately felt more like getting up this morning. Sitting down to some Olympics & friends before hitting the gym. My right hand is quite sore today – think I hurt it getting out of the rough yesterday. Shouldn’t have been there in the first place, but I was, and I had to get out. Still very disappointed in how I played yesterday. More competitions for me! The hand isn’t going to get in the way of my training, definately…I’ll just need to work through it. Was going to say work around it; but so not – I’m going through it! Plan to eat poached eggs on granary toast after training – just feel like some. But also need protein!

0815 – Detox & Thermobol
0930 – Green Tea
1130 – Training – 5 mins bike, 25 mins treadmill (walk 2 mins, run 3 mins @ 9.5 @ 1%), row 10 mins (1 min on, 1 min off), stretch lower body, 12 mins bike lvl 3 – 4. Approx 54ocal.
1340 – Oats, 2.5 spoons greek yoghurt, 1/2 mango. Green Tea
1500 – Coffee
1600 – 4 ryvita with 1/2 avocado, 1 tomato & 1 tsp cottage cheese
1730 – Coffee
1815 – salad with avocado & salmon, 1 small apple
2215 – 1/4 chicken, bacon, lettuce club, on white with mayo
2230 - Promax diet shake with 250ml skim milk
2300 – Thermobol, nectarine

Sweated like a fat chick today – although I don’t think it’s cause it was particularly hot in the gym, and I wasn’t roasting, but it poured out of me. A combination of what I took before training I think. The run was both better and worse than I thought. I had hoped that I would have been less shagged during the intervals that I did, but in saying that I felt strong through the run phases and wasn’t too shagged at the end of it. Added an extra 20sec to the final run, making 50sec at 10.5, which I was pleased about. I felt strong towards the end. The row fucking killed me. Felt a little light-headed towards the end of the ride, which I pushed pretty well, but at a constant 90 – 95rpm. I think maybe cause it was a long time since I’d had food. Hadn’t initially planned to fast that long before a cardio session, but it would have chewed up all my fuel and improved fat oxidation. I believe. My wrist is killing me! No eggs on toast – I can’t be arsed…will be oats, yoghurt & mango again. Yay…loving that combination!

Really tired at work today, also my wrist and hand are quite sore. I had the bit of sandwich with P-boy. I shouldn’t have, and now I feel very guilty about it. Not feeling too well in the stomach – gassy maybe. I think I am getting complacent with my food – allowing stuff to creep in. Yes, it was 1/4 of a sandwich, but it’s about more than that. It’s the mentality. It’s letting it in when I don’t need it. It’s weakness. Also didn’t drink enough water today. About 1.75 Lit. Nowhere near enough considering the cardio I did today. Maybe part of the reason I’m more tired. Thermobol taking is dropping off – need to be more mindful about that. Think I need to have something with veg tomorrow night. I’m going to Pretty Marys tomorrow night, but not chinese. It’s time to tighten up.

I’ve been picked to play for the house next weekend in a N.I. competition. Will be interesting to see how I go. I honestly didn’t expect to be picked, never thought that I would be in the running, or even considered. Not that I knew it was going on. D said to me at Lurgan something about ‘do you really not know how good a golfer you are?’. No. I wouldn’t say that I’m good…but apparently I am. Came 2nd at Lifeboats which was good, but still disappointed with the back nine – shite!

Finding that I’m more positive, smiley & have more time for people at work. Not so much because I need the attitude change. It’s not like I’m trying – although I do make an effort with people. Maybe it’s not intentional at all, maybe it’s just that I feel better when I’m doing this – I feel happier, more content & just more bubbly I suppose. Although I am getting more frustrated at Fatty. I feel that laziness is creeping in. No matter what’s doing, or what needs to be done, as soon as half 3 arrives she’s away. Some things need to be tightened up there. GI Joe’s onto it.

Anyway, to bed as I’m wrecked. Early start tomorrow.

Persistence, Dedication, Intensity, Committment. To the dead end!

Wrong timing…

Fucking shit! Woke up this morning, exactly as I’d planned – pumped to get into my first 2 k run in a week, but all plans were shattered again – Mr Big is still here. Fuck. I could still go down and do it I guess, but it’s not worth the risk – I can’t get caught working out in the gym alone, even though GI Joe has given me his permission. I can wait till 6.10 at the latest, if they’re not gone I’ve got to shower up here then get to work. Fuck! Fucking twice now that my plan has been shot to hell, in the space of 12 hours. What do I need to do? 6.00 – Think I’m just going to call it a non-opportunity & shower up here…starting to work out at 6 is getting tight…I’ll do a couple of sets of push ups, squats & crunches the stretch for my workout instead. Not the same as a kick arse 2k but it’ll have to do for this morning.

If I can’t workout, I’ll shift it to this afternoon – before golf, or after. Although I’m not sure there will be golf this afternoon with the absolute lashing that’s been dished out here. The rain is rediculous…I could nearly sail away on a boat if this continues.

Weight: 75.1kg (after breakfast, no shoes)
0515 – Detox & Thermobol
0630 – Oats with 2 spoons greek yoghurt & 1/2 Mango. Green Tea
0900 – 120g carrot sticks, 75g cottage cheese, 1 banana & Green Tea
1030 – cup of coffee
1145 – Salad with tuna & 1/4 avocado
1400 – Thermobol, Green tea, small apple
1540 – Training - Olympic challenge, 400m top-xt, lvl 3 – 50 sec. Run 2k (12.05min), Bike – 10 mins level 4. Back – D Handle Supine Row (3 x 5), VT – 8, 8, 15 @ 35, Standing cable row (triangle, 1 foot), 3 x 12 (22.5), Rotator cuff work 1 x 10 each way, both shoulders @ 2.5, some kneeling + stand on ball.
2100 – Thermobol, 100g cold grilled chicken, 75g lean pork. 100ml skim milk.
2130 – 150g grilled cod, veg – broccoli, beans, snow peas, sweet corn, carrot – 2.5 portions maybe.

Worked 0700 – 1530 then trained. Was pretty happy with my run today. Initially, while I was doing it I was ‘oh fuck, I’m fucked, can’t believe I can’t do this‘, but then realised that I ran 1.6k at 10.3, 1% which I don’t think I’ve done before, well stoked with my time considering I walked 50m to get up to speed then had a 50m break (totally needed as totally fucked). Not sure if I cained my back, but worked hard all the same. Was very aware of the golf day I have tomorrow – didn’t want to push too hard, but still felt I gave it 100% on all the exercises. Something tasted funny about the cottage cheese/carrot combination today – think it was the carrots as they’re getting on a bit, but not 100%. Plan to have fish tonight – looking forward to fish & veg actually. No butter on it though! Will buy a lemon when I’m out today & bake it with that in it. Mmm…fish!

So craving carbs though!! Oh my god I’m craving carbs. Totally looking forward to having some fish – I’m also warming a lean pork loin chop that needs eating…more in an effort to stop woofing down everything in sight. I know there are cherry ripes in the cupboard, don’t want to eat them really though…I don’t think. Perhaps some jols?! Fucking carbs. Fucking body. Fucking head. Gnawing on some cold grilled chicken. Maybe I’m just hungry.

This afternoon I feel low, flat, tired – a bit down maybe. But not down at all. I am happy with things at the moment – I think it might be the diet. A bit of carb crash, but then I guess that I’ve had enough fruit & veg over the last couple of days that that shouldn’t happen. I need some Milo!

Persist with the difficult, push the boundaries, outdo expectations, improve performance!